Thursday, February 13, 2014

The Accidental Death of Candy

So, my friends, a noteworthy event happened today in Kindergarten.  The stretching of Mrs. Womack's comfort zone and the death of a dear class pet (ahem...lizard) named Candy.  Today we came back up to the treehouse after lunch and the kids were SUPER sugared up.  Today was their pseudo Valentine's Day (since tomorrow is a field trip to Crescent Moon Farm) and they had all eaten their fill of candy from this morning and cookies from yesterday's Kid's Activity on campus.  So I decided to let them burn off a little energy before we started our reading block.  They had caught a second lizard (who has lovingly been named Sven Rainbow Smack) and wanted to have him join Candy in The Lizard Sanctuary (aka-a terrarium that was the former home of hermit crabs).  But upon opening the cage to put Sven Rainbow Smack in, Candy leapt out!

Now I have to let you know, for your mind's eye's sake, that all the kids I had up at the treehouse were girls (we were missing our only boy).  So when Candy leapt from her plastic prison, the blood curdling screams commenced.  From them AND from me!  She was running all over my bathroom so Lovise had the grand idea to grab the top to the cake tupperware from the kitchen to trap her under.  Success!! find a way to put Sven Rainbow Smack and Candy into The Lizard Sanctuary together without either one of them jumping out.  The plan was to put Sven Rainbow Smack in first.  He seemed to be the least excitable of the two.  Though the task was a little tricky, it was a success!  Jozlyn and Helena had been given the task of keeping Candy firmly trapped under the cake tupperware top until it was her turn to enter The Lizard Sanctuary.  There was so much excitement when Sven Rainbow Smack was finally apprehended that some pushing of the cake tupperware happened.  And, in the style of a meat grinder, Candy's tail got smooshed under the edge of the cake tupperware.  And then some more scooting commenced and her body was...well...see for yourself:

If you just said "Ew" in your head, you're right.  It was pretty gruesome.  What you're *not* seeing is that Jozlyn and Simay have both gasped and turned away while Solveig, Helena, and Lovise are all three staring on in horror with mouths agape.  You're also not seeing the tail still wiggling and Candy's mouth opening and closing.  The kids had a moral dilemma on their hands because they all thought she was still alive but none of them thought she had much hope for long term survival...

Teachable moment:  "She's really dead, guys.  Sometimes little animals still have nerves that are working even after they're dead and those nerves make their body parts keep moving for a while.  But she's totally dead.  Let's get some paper towels and scoop her up and put her in the trash..." :(

"But Mrs. Womack, we have to bury her!"  "Yeah!"  "She needs a funeral!"  "She needs a coffin!"  "We have to dig her a grave!"  "We should sing her a song!"

Ok, ok.  But *I* am not touching her.  Here's a cupcake liner cup you can use for a coffin.  Y'all figure it out...

Success!  Then out they went to find a proper resting place for their beloved class pet...

Now it's time to get ready for her "memorial service".  Lovise decided that everyone needed to say a few words about Candy.  Simay suggested they sing "Waves of Mercy"....

And so, while trying not to giggle audibly, I recorded their little funeral.  It's adorable...and VERY serious mind you.  When I can get my phone to sync up, I'll post it here.  Solveig and Simay both said "I Like Candy", Lovise said "She was a very nice and sweet lizard and we all loved her."  Jozlyn said "She walked a lot.  She played a lot."  Helena was a little reluctant to say anything nice about Candy (even though Lovise told her she had to), but finally she mustered the courage to say "We all liked her".  

And so goes the story of how Candy the lizard went to lizard heaven.  Her mangled body is buried in a cupcake liner cup somewhere in my front yard.  Poor Sven Rainbow Smack has a look of terror in his eye in The Lizard Sanctuary.  Hopefully he won't suffer the same fate... o_O

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